Beau's Birth Story

Beau is now 4 months old and a pure joy to our family. He is what we were missing; he completes our family in so many ways. October was a busy month for us and I can't think of a better way to end Down Syndrome Awareness month than to share his birth story with all of you. 

As many of you know Norman transitioned to a new job near Baltimore in early June and my mom came to stay with us in NC "just in case". Our plan was for Norman to come home on the 29th just in time for the scheduled csection on June 30. You know what they say about well laid plans......

I woke up around 6am on June 28th with some pain but quickly brushed it off in my mind thinking it was Braxton Hicks or lack of sleep or just 2nd time around stuff. I laid back down and the pain kept coming and I kept trying to find ways to make my big, pregnant self more comfortable. After about 45 minutes I thought is this a pattern? Should I be timing this? So I did start timing my pains. Sure enough every 10 minutes it came and went. I knew this was IT. Today would be the day. I called my doctor who told me to get to the office as soon as they opened at 8. I immediately hung up and called Norman. Not wanting to stress him out, but knowing the urgency for him to get on the road ASAP! "Honey, I'm having contractions. You need to come home now!"  He handled it like a champ. My husband who would normally go straight to panic mode calmly assured me he was getting on the road to make the 5 hour drive and see his 3rd baby make his grand entrance into the world. 

I quickly hopped in the shower. Thinking to myself, "this day was my day...I need a pedicure and I need to go let a professional wash, dry, and fix my hair."  Since this was not my first rodeo I knew how important good hair was for post delivery photos. Ha! 

We (me, my mom, the twins) arrived at the doc's office at 8am and by this time my contractions were 4 minutes apart. AND THEY HURT!! Kudos to all you natural birth gals. 

In the shakiest voice with tear filled eyes I told the receptionist, "I think I am in labor". They took me back immediately and after examining me the doctor sent me straight to the hospital. Do not stop anywhere...straight to the hospital. 

Mom is driving with help from the GPS and between contractions I am frantically trying to arrange someone to meet us at the hospital to be with Luke and Della Rose. My sweet friend and absolute angel, Crystal, cancelled all her plans and rushed to meet us there. As soon as I arrived things moved fast. Yep, you're in labor. Yep, you're having this baby today. Nope, we can't wait for your hubby to get here. 

When I had the twins I remember the epidural. I was a tad scared, but nothing ..NOTHING like this time. I was TERRIFIED. I believe in my heart of hearts I knew something was different. Something I didn't expect was going to happen. 

Prepped and ready the doctors got started.. Mom was by my side. All of the medical people were nothing but reassuring. They kept me informed of each step they were making. And before you know it....out comes my beautiful baby boy! He was a little blue and his cry was a little weird but it was all good. He is here and our family is complete. 

Let's rewind for a minute. Over the course of my pregnancy Norman and I had wrestled with permanent birth control AKA tubal ligation AKA getting my tubes tied. We never really expected to get pregnant after the twins. But that is a different story for a different day....out sweet, sweet story of infertility. We did decide to get my tubes tied and we were more than at peace about it.  The doctor was well aware of this plan. We discussed it before the c section and I had signed the special paper giving her permission to do it. 

So back to the delivery room....things are a little crazy as they often are. They called neonatal down to help Beau begin breathing normally. No big deal. But then I heard my doctor ask the neonatal doctor, "Do you want to talk to mom before I tie her tubes?"  Neonatal doctor looks very busy...maybe she didn't hear or is she uncomfortable with this question? What is going on? Then my doctor repeats in a firm tone, "I have already tied one tube and I am about to do the other. Before I do I need you to come talk to mom."  WAIT. WHAT?!? Is he dying? Will he make it? What is wrong? Somebody please come talk to me. I am helpless, lying open on this table. 

After what felt like hours the neonatal doctor walked over to me. She knelt down and calmly said those words, "your baby has some physical characteristics of Down syndrome." A million thoughts run through my mind, yet I am suddenly completely numb. How could this happen? How did they not catch this? TERRIFIED about our future but relieved to know that's what the big deal is with tying my tubes.  Ok, this information does not change our plans for the size of our family; if anything it confirms our decision. "Yes, go ahead as planned," I tell my doctor.  As she is finishing up with me, Beau is rushed away to the NICU. 

I'm not sure how long I was in recovery, but I don't think it was long before Norman got there. He walked into recovery with that big smile, so anxious to meet his boy. I quickly realized I am the one who has to pull the carpet from under him. He doesn't know yet. He sat down beside my bed. For a second I thought about not telling him. Crazy, right? If I don't tell him I can carry this all on myself and he can meet his son with no knowledge of his possible diagnosis. But I knew I had to. This was not a secret that could be kept. So I told him when he asked, "He is ok. He is in the NICU. They think he has Down syndrome." Norman spent a few seconds in disbelief and then went rushing to see him. 

I have wrestled with where to stop this story. There is so much more to share about the hours and days following Beau's birth. I promiseI will share that soon. Bottom line is God is faithful. God provides peace. He is the perfecter of our faith. And God ordains our days long before we can ever imagine what they may look like. I can't wait to share the rest of our hospital story soon. We went from complete grief and desperation to hope and joy. Be looking for that story around Thanksgiving! Thank you for reading if you made it this far! 

Peace & Love,

Mahala